At your feet
by Shadow Of Castiel
Summary: A fic written for the Dean/Castiel "Renegade Angels" fic exchange that ran over the summer on LiveJournal. Rated M for adult content Dean/Castiel


There was a slight chill in the evening air, as Dean waited in the darkness, feeling the night wrap around him like the softest of shrouds. He looked up the skies stretched endlessly above him, saw the heavens filled with armies of friendly stars, saw the moon smiling down on him, watching over him as closely as Castiel had always done.

He sighed, breath puffing slightly out in steamy bursts as he breathed, feeling peace settle through him, bone deep, soul deep,, making his worried heart, his tortured soul seem quiet for once. He rarely had peace from his own memories, of Hell, of torture, of being student to Alastair's mentor, of ripping serried ranks of poor souls to shreds on their bloodied racks. The only times that he did find peace was when he was with Castiel. Dean found the angel's presence, soothing, forgiving, calming, and through the angel he felt a chance at redemption, a chance to grab back all that he felt he was owed by the world, by God himself, even from Sam.

Castiel had never betrayed him, never willingly hurt him, or brought him to harm. Even when the angel had turned his back on him on that one occasion when he'd stated - "I serve Heaven, I don't serve Man, and I certainly don't serve you!" - it wasn't Castiel talking. It had been Castiel's superiors talking through him, making him speak lies - the pain in Castiel's eyes had borne witness to that, had made a mockery of the angel's words, as though he hadn't really wanted to say the things that he had to Dean, hadn't really meant them.

That knowledge at the time had given Dean hope, had armed the hunter with the knowledge that Castiel would be back for him, would never willingly leave his side. Castiel was his angel, and his alone, and they'd grown ever closer in recent weeks.

Dena looked to the stars once again, snorting in amusement, a small smile curling the corners of his lips as he thought of a time, back when they'd first met. Castiel had been standing in Bobby's kitchen, and Dean had awoken, after hearing the sounds of his wings cutting through the air, heavy, insistent, yet oddly comforting all the same.

He thought once again of when Castiel had insisted that he was not a guardian angel, that he was not there to perch on Dean's shoulder, and yet, that was the very thing that Castiel had become, in recent times. He may not have planned it that way originally, but that was the role he had grown into. On another occasion, he'd even stated that he'd gotten too close to Dean; a problem that neither of them had an issue with, but Castiel's superiors had.

Dean dropped his gaze from the sky above, directing it instead to the water below, watching as the river rippled on it's endless quest for the sea. He watched as the stars sparkled in the water's surface, shining like so many trapped diamonds, waiting to be claimed. He turned his attention to the moon's reflection, still looking beautiful in a coldly majestic way, and again he thought of Castiel.

Like the moon, Castiel seemed distant, cold when he had to be, yet loving when he wanted to be, when they were alone, and was always there for Dean when he needed him, without question, without fail, forever loyal.

He thought of the time in Bobby's kitchen when Castiel had eased himself into Dean's personal space, coming too close for comfort at the time, making Dean feel uncomfortable with his closeness and his demands for respect. Yet as time drew on, Dean became accustomed to Castiel invading his personal space, had started to get used to it, and now welcomed it, whenever it happened. He purposefully sought Castiel's closeness, stole his warmth on a cold night, cuddled into him as Castiel wrapped deceptively strong arms around him, so soft wings like a whisper against Dean's cheek. Dean found that he couldn't stand anyone else getting that close to him; anyone else but Castiel.

He thought of how the angel looked at him, blue eyes usually so intense, yet so loving when he gazed upon Dean, a smile trapped at the corners whenever Castiel reached for the hunter, to caress his cheek with gentle fingers. Dean thought of all the times that Castiel seemed to purposefully seek the closeness of Dean's body, to touch him as though seeking comfort and reassurance for himself. These thoughts led Dean to start to wonder just who needed whom the most out of Castiel and himself. It was then that he realized that Castiel needed him as much as Dean needed Castiel.

He sighed, wished Castiel was there with him right then and wasn't surprised when he heard the familiar sounds of heavy wings flapping in the night, somewhere close by. He heard Castiel's soft footfalls coming closer, felt the angel's intense stare boring into him, and Dean was already smiling before he even turned to face the angel.

The moon shone down upon Castiel's dark haired head, for a moment looking like a halo shining there, lighting up Castiel's thin face, making him look more ethereal, beautiful, other worldly, his eyes lit up from within with his own angelic essence. Dean couldn't take his eyes from him, couldn't believe that Castiel would even want to talk to him, let alone want to hug him, kiss him, make love to him. Dean felt that he didn't deserve Castiel's love, that Castiel seemed too good for him, too perfect, somehow.

In that one instant, Dean felt truly blessed, swamped by emotions too big for him, too over powering and then he knew. He did deserve Castiel, did deserve to be loved by him, to be touched by him. As Castiel had once told him, good things do happen - and Castiel was his good thing. After all that had happened to Dean during his lifetime, Castiel was his one shining star, his brought point in the otherwise gloomy aspect of his life, his reason to live, to love, to be loved.

He walked forward then, needed to feel Castiel's warmth, needed to share the same air as the angel, to bask in Castiel's peace and calm and self assurance and love. The angel just watched him come nearer, arms raised slightly when the hunter came nearer, raised higher when Dean came near enough to hug.

Dean opened his mouth to speak, but Castiel shushed him gently before a word fell past Dean's lips. Any further attempt at speech was stolen from Dean when Castiel pressed gentle lips against his own, feeling impossibly soft and kissable right then. Dean's eyes closed, losing himself in that kiss, satisfied groans of pleasure joining Castiel's own as lips worked against lips, tongues explored open, wet mouths, hands traced each other's bodies underneath the sudden burden of too many clothes.

Castiel broke the kiss first, and Dean turned his face to the sky, eyes still closed, breathing in the soft night air, reeling after the intensity of an urgent, hungry kiss. Breath plumed in front of his face in a steamy geyser, breath hitching in his chest as Castiel's teeth, lips, mouth worked their way down Dean's jaw line and to the sensitive skin of his neck. Dean cried out Castiel's name, the first time either one of them had spoken in the time they'd shared so far, murmured his name quieter when he felt Castiel's lips lock on Dean's neck, sucking a bruise there for the world to see.

Castiel answered Dean's moans with moans of his own, muffled against Dean's neck and reverberating through Dean's body, as his lips continued to kiss, to nuzzle at the hunter's skin. His chest rose, fell, in a pleasured sigh, as his wings slowly unfurled and wrapped around Dean when he felt the hunter shiver. He ran gentle fingers over Dean's abdomen, slid them beneath his T Shirt and stroked, raising goose bumps in their wake. He felt his erection straining against his boxers, making his pants seem tight against his cock, but he ignored it for the time being, denied himself immediate release, immediate pleasure.

Dean moaned again when Castiel's teeth gently nipped at his neck, nipped again, before the angel's tongue lapped at the bites, soothing them, as he wrapped his arms close about the hunter's body. Dean leant into Castiel, turned his face more fully to the angel's. Castiel was so close, Dean could feel his hair tickling his cheek, could smell the clean, fresh air smell of him that Dean loved. He felt his body react to Castiel's closeness, to the way the angel was treating his willing body and felt his erection become pleasurable, swiftly becoming uncomfortable.

He wrapped his hand around Castiel's, moving it from his side to his cock, encouraging the angel to start rubbing him through his jeans. Castiel stroked Dean willingly, finally coming up for air from Dean's neck, already full lips seeming even fuller from kisses and bites bestowed. His eyes were half closed, tip of his tongue still peeking from between his lips, as he dragged fingers heavily across Dean's cock.

Dean gave a strangled cry, moving his hips in time with Castiel's steady strokes, fingers looped around the angel's wings, and waist. His hip bumped against Castiel's own straining erection, making the angel give out a strangled cry of his own. Again, it went ignored, as he concentrated instead on giving his hunter pleasure.

Dean's eyes slowly closed, lips parting into a soundless "o" of desire as he came closer to release. His shoulders tensed, his head was thrown back before he finally cried out as he came, releasing himself hard into his boxers with a loud, pleasured cry of Castiel's name. His breath caught in his throat, almost threatening to choke him, as he rode out the waves of bliss coursing through his veins, setting every nerve ending aflame, threatening to burn him alive where he stood.

Castiel was staring at him intently when Dean finally looked at him, blue eyes hungry, tongue licking almost nervously at swollen lips as he stared. He moaned when Dean slowly unzipped his pants, fingers easing in to take a firm hold of Castiel's throbbing erection, fingers cold against the super heated, sensitive skin. Castiel's eyes remained open, trained on Dean's face as the hunter firmly pumped his hand rapidly over Castiel's cock, rubbing clever fingers over the head, across the slit, making Castiel cry out with every sweep and pass.

Castiel thrust his hips into Dean's hand, face going slack the nearer he came to release. His eyes started looking glazed, lips parted more, breath became more laboured, dragged in a constricted throat, before finally he came, coating Dean's hand with his release, screaming Dean's name to the waiting moon overhead. His wings stood to attention with a sharp snap, spanning the bridge easily, shaking in the night air as he came, angelic light shining out from eyes, mouth, nostrils as he lost control.

Dean turned his gaze away, despite the beauty of Castiel's light, remembering all too clearly what had happened to Pamela Barnes. The light grew brighter, then disappeared completely when Castiel finally regained control of himself, wings slowly relaxing to hang proudly by Castiel's sides. Dean's eyes ran over Castiel then, at the way he stood, proud, pleasured, every inch the angel of the Lord, with his wings glinting in the light from the moon. He looked beautiful, perfect, and every inch of him belonging to Dean.

The hunter choked back a sudden sob, making Castiel stare hard at him, head tilted to the side, brow furrowed in confusion, even concern.

"Dean? What's the matter? Are you hurting?" Castiel asked, coming closer, eyes scanning Dean's body for obvious signs of pain.

When he saw nothing, his eyes flicked to Dean's once again, amazed by the wet tracks of Dean's tears staining the hunter's cheeks. He leant in, revelling once again in Dean's presence, before he kissed Dean's tears away, licking the salt from his full lips slowly. Dean wrapped his arms around the angel, gripped him tight in need, leaning his head against the angel's shoulder, as tears slowly dried, though not forgotten. Castiel turned his face to Dean's, nuzzling his cheek gently with his own, before he wrapped his arms around the hunter, giving comfort as much as he took it, before he sighed gently.

"I love you, Cas," Dean squeezed out past tear choked throat. "Don't you leave me. Don't you ever leave me, Cas. Or I swear it will kill me."

Castiel closed his eyes, lips pressing together in sudden pain, as tears suddenly pricked against his own eyes.

_So this was what had caused Dean's tears, _Castiel thought to himself. _He's scared of losing me. That I will leave him._

_Castiel rubbed Dean's back gently, finding comfort, finding strength from holding Dean close, as he felt his true nature becoming quiet at the feel of Dean being so near. His wings took Dean in their gentle embrace, shivering slightly when Dean stroked them gently with questing fingertips._

"_Dean," Castiel sighed out, need settled deep within his voice._

_He repeated Dean's name again, louder, as Dean continued stroking his wings, before he kissed the other man, stilling the hunter's hand gently._

"_Dean. I can't leave you, ever. My heart, my soul belongs at your feet. I need you, I crave you as much as I feel you need and crave me. It would kill me if I had to leave you. It nearly did," the angel said, voice softening on the last sentence._

_He thought once again of the time when he'd had to tell Dean that he didn't serve him, feeling fresh pain, fresh regret stab through him and he closed his eyes against the pain of the memory. As if feeling, sharing the angel's pain, Dean wrapped arms around him, clinging to him as tightly as Castiel clung to him._

_For Castiel himself, who had always known humanity at a distance, found them as incomprehensible as they saw him, found comfort in Dean's closeness, more than he'd ever imagined he would back when he first met him. It was only then that Castiel realized just how much he'd come to depend upon Dean, how far he would go to be in Dean's presence, to feel his kiss, his hands, to know what it felt like to love, to make love under the stars._

_In this, the angel and the human were much alike, both needed each other, both drew comfort from one another, and in teaching Dean of his own self worth, Castiel had rediscovered his ..._

_fin _


End file.
